A Loving Mom
In Loving Memory of Mrs. Saiko Hirade Richmond
We received the call Friday morning, December 20, 2019. “It doesn’t look good…she doesn’t have much time. She’s on a CPAP for a while, but after the doctor removes it, she will have about 12-24 hours.” Our hearts sank as we scurried to pack and make travel arrangements to Columbia, S.C. Upon landing in Charlotte, we picked up the rental car with plenty of time for the hour drive to Columbia and the hospital. So we thought…
As my husband and the rental car agent finalized our paperwork, my phone rang. “Pat, have you all landed?” “Yes, we are in the rental car now leaving the airport.” “Is Tony driving?” “Yes.” “Don’t tell him yet, but Mom passed. Don’t go to the hospital, come to the house.” “Ok.” I tried to conceal the tears by looking away, but after 43 years of marriage, my husband read my face. He slowly drove out the garage on to the freeway and we cried.
We desperately tried to be by her side before she departed, but her heart gave out. She went home to be with the Lord while we were still in the air. She slept away before they took the CPAP off. We thanked the Lord that she transitioned peacefully without the need for breathing tubes. Mom expressed to me earlier of her readiness to leave.
The family pulled together to coordinate her home-going service. We flew our son Ryan down to officiate, share memories of his grandmother, and deliver a gospel message. On Tuesday, December 24, Christmas Eve, we celebrated Mom’s life with family and friends.
As my husband despaired over not being by his mother’s side prior to her departure, I reminded him of the last memory we shared with her. Shortly before her passing, we all locked hands, circled around her bedside, and prayed for her before we left for Dallas. We kissed Mom and told her we loved her and she whispered she loved us too. She smiled as we walked out of the room. What a beautiful memory to cherish.
As Mother’s Day approaches, I realize how much I miss her and all she meant to me. You see…I simply called her my Mom, not my mother-in-law, just Mom. The Lord blessed me with two beautiful mothers, my birth mother (Mama) and my mother by marriage (Mom). I never felt like a daughter-in-law because Mom treated me like her third daughter. We experienced a unique relationship despite our cultural differences.
Born and raised in Tokyo, Japan, Mom met her future husband in Tokyo while he served in the United States Army. After a year of stringent counseling and applications for her visa and approval for marriage, Mom and Foster Noble wed in 1953. Shortly after, they relocated to Columbia, S.C. and birthed three children from this union: my husband Tony, and his two sisters Kimiko and Michiko. Sadly, Foster passed in 1964. Mom later met and married Master Sergeant John Richmond of Burlington, N.C. in 1972. I joined the family when Tony and I wed in 1976. Mom and John enjoyed a beautiful marriage for 47 years.
I admired Mom for so many reasons. She believed in education and although she never completed her high school degree, she taught herself to speak English upon her arrival in the U.S. She saw to it that all three of her children received their high school education and college degrees. I admired her work ethic. She worked as a supervisor at Oxford of Columbia, a clothing and apparel business, for 30 years.
Mom possessed a sweet calm spirit, yet we experienced the feisty side of her when she wanted to get her point across. She stood short in statue, but surpassed height in love. She adored her family and had a generous and kind heart. She enjoyed cooking and fed anyone who walked into her home. I savored her authentic Japanese delicacies-rice cotti (Japanese beef stew), cucumber salad, fried rice, teriyaki chicken and so many others. Whenever we came home, she whipped up our favorites. No matter what other meats sat on the table, she always prepared teriyaki chicken especially for me.
Mom taught me how to be a mom. We never shared a harsh or unkind word towards each other. She maintained boundaries in our marriage, never overstepping, yet we invited her in for wisdom and advice when needed. She stood by my side. When she sensed strife between Tony and me, she simply said to Tony, “What did you do?” I loved her for having my back. I strive to cultivate this same relationship with Ryan’s wife. I call Dani my daughter, she calls me Mom.
I stated earlier that Mom treated me as her third daughter. At Christmas, if Kim or Michi got a coat, I got a coat. If one of them opened a box with a wallet and cash, I looked for my box. In fact, Kim, Michi and I tried to get to our gifts from Mom first so we would be the first to be surprised. The color, style, and size might be different, but we received the same items.
Mom helped me through the ups and downs of my marriage and family. She consoled me through the death of our little girl and rejoiced and celebrated the births of our two sons and three grandchildren. She cheered me on through graduate school and all my other accomplishments. She planted many seeds of love between us.
Our greatest bond centered on our love for the Lord. Mom accepted Jesus as her Lord and Savior despite growing up in a Japanese culture. Even though she spoke few words on the phone, we sat many days at her kitchen table talking endless about the goodness of God, life, and yes, the trials and joys of husbands. She worshipped at a local church, but yearned to learn more and joined a weekly Bible study group. If Mom lived as Naomi in biblical times, I would be Ruth and choose to go with her. I will forever cherish the memories of our mother-daughter talks.
On this Mother’s Day, show the mothers in your life how much you care. Let them hear you verbally say “I love you.” Experience the warmth of the smiles that span their faces. It might be the last memory you share.
I don’t know about you, but I thank the Lord for bringing a godly, loving Mom into my life. I dearly miss her and relish her memories each time I gaze upon her pictures or the many Japanese items in my home. I know she rests in Jesus’ loving arms. I’m so glad she knew I loved her. Instead of saying goodbye at her home-going, I simply said “so long…until we meet again.” I stand on His blessed assurance that Mom and I will be reunited. Why? Simply…
